Samuel Langhorne Clemens, better known as Mark Twain, was an American author and humorist. He is most noted for his novels ‘The Adventures of Tom Sawyer’ and its sequel, ‘Adventures of Huckleberry Finn’.
O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief… for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.
Of all God’s creatures there is only one that cannot be made the slave of the lash. That one is the cat. If man could be crossed with a cat it would improve man, but it would deteriorate the cat.
I have a higher and grander standard of principle than George Washington. He could not lie; I can, but I won’t.
Good breeding consists in concealing how much we think of ourselves and how little we think of the other person.
I have never let my schooling interfere with my education.
Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?
When we remember we are all mad, the mysteries disappear and life stands explained.
It is full of interest. It has noble poetry in it; and some clever fables; and some blood-drenched history; and some good morals; and a wealth of obscenity; and upwards of a thousand lies.
A classic is something that everybody wants to have read and nobody wants to read.
Golf is a good walk spoiled.
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