Quotes from unknown sources.
Heaven doesn’t want me, and hell’s afraid I’ll take over.
Remember in elementary school, you were told that in case of fire you have to line up quietly in a single file line from smallest to tallest. What is the logic in that? What, do tall people burn slower?
My mom said she learned how to swim when someone took her out in the lake and threw her off the boat. I said, “Mom, they weren’t trying to teach you how to swim.”
Not only is this incomprehensible, but the ink is ugly and the paper is from the wrong kind of tree.
Don’t say yes until I finish talking.
Nature abhors a hero. For one thing, he violates the law of conservation of energy. For another, how can it be the survival of the fittest when the fittest keeps putting himself in situations where he is most likely to be creamed?
What’s “real time”? Here and now. As opposed to fake time which only occurs there and then.
If you add a teaspoon of wine to a barrel of sewage, you get sewage. If you add a teaspoon of sewage to a barrel of wine, you get sewage. This, my son, is entropy.
What can you say about a society that believes God is dead and Elvis is alive?
Some people are never afflicted with stress, but are carriers of it.
© 2018 Quotes & Quips | Theme by Eleven Themes